Family Pictures

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8 months

Again, another month has passed. It's bizarre that in the midst of each day, as I am enveloped in diapers and spits, giggles and cries, teething and tears and wondering if the hours could pass any more slowly....all of the sudden the day is over. The babies are bathed and in their be and I am exhausted. And I couldn't begin to tell you where the time went. How the days can seem so long, yet pass by in a whirlwind. Leaving me winded, as it carries their babyhood away.
I have become addicted to watching their birth. Tiny little sprites, emerging into the world. Declaring it as their own. I become transfixed on the four of us. Watching the beginning of a family. How hopeful and grateful we were. How the happiness encompassed us, wrapping joy around us like a blanket. How there was enough love in that room, at that single moment to propel me and sustain me for the rest of my life. And now....eight months later, when I don't feel like there is enough of me to go around. When both babies are screaming and want me only to themselves and their cries echo off the four walls like ping pong balls, and I am covered in spit and poop and tears....I wouldn't change a thing. Not one single thing. If I had known at the moment of their birth the overwhelming love I would have for them, I would never have believed it. The reality of them, in my arms and within my heart is so much more. So much sweeter. I would walk through fire for them, so that their path is only ash.

Some Baby Stats:
Beckett: also known as: "the bucket, buckaroo, beck"
probably a little over 17lbs; one bottom tooth just emerging; rolling all
over the place; not sitting alone yet...but does a fabulous "tripod";
loves to suck his lower lip; very vocal, especially "dada"; very sensitive;
loves Popsicles and paper
Blake: also known as: "Blakey, and the grenade"
probably a little over 17lbs as well; no teeth yet; just learning to roll
over; loves his hands and wrists, and can be caught in the "prayer" position
quite often; very vocal, says "dada" but loves to make "GGGGGG" sounds;
very laid back and funny; loves Popsicles and Zoey the dog

Mmmm.....

so the babies are teething :)

Bowling Green

What a weekend. My best friend in the whole world got married. In Bowling Green. Which meant an overnight stay....without the babies. As the date approached, a myriad of emotions would pass through me. From excitement to dread. Excited to have a romantic getaway with my husband, and dread to leave my babies. I have never left them overnight, expect by necessity in the NICU. My face is the first face they see in the morning and the last one that they see at night. We have a routine, me and my guys. What would they think? Would they miss me? Would they know that I was coming back for them? What if they did something momentous while I was away? Like sit up on their own. How could I possibly leave my babies? How could I possibly miss my best friend's wedding? How could I be two places at once?

So....my very good friend actually VOLUNTEERED to watch the boys. I knew they would be fine with her. I knew she wouldn't just take care of them, but love them. So after many tears, we headed for Bowling Green. And it was NICE. Refreshing even. We talked, we danced, we laughed. We had a wonderful time.

I certainly missed the babies. Especially at 1am when I had to pump. After breakfast, I was ready to get home. Ready to see them, to smell them, to feel them. To hear them laugh, giggle. And it was just as I had imagined. The babies were waiting for us on the front porch. They saw me. And the kicking started. Their little legs pumping with excitement when they saw me, their momma. And I couldn't get my hands on them fast enough. I picked them up, inhaled their baby scents and all was well with my world.

And if that wasn't enough. This boy.....rolled over tonight. Belly to back :)

The reason I love this video: look at Blake...he's got his legs resting on the bar, just chilling ;)

September 11, 2011

Today was a wonderful day. I spent the day with "my guys" down on the waterfront. We took a picnic to the playground. We sat on the big swing together. All three of us. We watched the boats on the water and the planes in the sky. And then we walked to the Great Lawn and saw the flags. Over 3000 flags in the ground in honor of the men and women that lost their lives on this day ten years ago. I was overwhelmed with emotion as I saw all those flags. I found myself crying. And so I bent down and whispered to the babies that I loved them. Ten years ago, these babies weren't even a concept in my unconscious mind. Yet I can't deny the fact that I am able to be here with babies, able to push them on the swing so that they can feel the breeze of freedom, because of the men and women over there defending it.

never too young for oreos

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ADORABLE :)