5 months

How is it possible that my babies are five months old? Where did the time go? I was cautioned that time would pass quickly. That I should savor every moment. But that's not enough. I want to freeze time. I want to capture every moment and relive it. The good and even the bad. For I fear that all too quickly time will continue to pass and I will no longer be able to hold both my babies in my arms. Or worse yet, that they will no longer want me to hold them in my arms. This elite club, otherwise known as motherhood has completely left me smitten. Drooling on myself with the joy of my babies. There are hard days. And long days. And days filled with tears. But those days are not the days I remember. And the good days far outnumber the bad ones. I never quite understood what people meant when they said that parenthood changes everything. Yet IT does. It's as if my heart, while now multiplied and giant, no longer belongs to me. It belongs to them. Their smile is the the beat of my heart, and their tears cause it to stop. I inhale them as if they are a drug. I cannot compare who I was before to whom I am now. For there is no comparison. It's as if I took my first breath the moment they took theirs. My eyes are open where before they were closed. I was empty and now am full. I look into their crystal blue eyes and see the future and all that it holds. And I become both excited and sorrowful. For I want them to grow and achieve. To accomplish every dream. But I don't want to ever lose that sensation of having them in my arms, chins dripping with milk and eyes so bright that they bore a hole straight into my soul. But I know that time will pass, and I will no longer have arms full of babies. Just a heart full of memories.