27 Weeks!

Another week down! It has been exactly 48 days of bedrest. It has been 7 days of complete bedrest. And while it sucks, this being trapped inside of my home, the boys are still trapped within me. Just where they need to be. I remember when I went to get my cerclage placed and I was so scared. I just kept pleading with my doctor to get me to viability. Just get me four more weeks. I felt so helpless and was acutely aware that the cerclage could all be for naught. Because I was only 20 weeks. No medical professional in this world would save a 20 week fetus. And now here we are. Seven weeks later. Viability is not a concern anymore. These boys would survive. Certainly they would be little, and their challenges would be great, but they would survive. The fact that in a few weeks I will be holding my boys in my arms fills me with such awe. Such complete and utter disbelief. I never imagined, after the journey that we have been on, that we would be so close to the destination that we had only dreamed of. Granted, I still have bad days, days where I cry from dawn to dusk. Mourning the pregnancy that I had expected. Missing the fervor of holiday season. Aching to spend time with family and friends, instead of lying on my couch. But just as I become the captain of my own pity party, the boys kick me defiantly. Reminding me of their lives, their mere existence. And my determination to endure is renewed. I am beginning to get excited. Beginning to hope for both my heart and my arms to be filled. Beginning to see my family in the future. Me and my boys. And it's official....they have names. But don't get too excited. The names won't be revealed until the boys make their debut. Have wonderful week....and thank you for all the continued support.